Pinned toot

me, reading a youtube video description: "decalcifying your prostate chakra"
@Fruitbowlman , immediately: "im going to break every bone in your body, im going to come into your house and maul you like a wild bear"

Pinned toot

"haha, they'll be sure to love this post" he thinks to himself, typing a horrid string of barely intelligible words onto the screen
it's been months since he's left his chair, he's not sure if the outside world exists anymore, his mother stopped bringing hot pockets a month ago and yet he still lives
God weeps

Pinned toot

*my nuts fall off and roll down the street into someone's house like a can of ravioli in a chef boyardee commercial*

Pinned toot

*as my hands mercilessly bap at the keyboard, the camera zooms out to a broken destroyed ruin of our world, superimposed on the sky in the distance are the words "RON PAUL 2468" and directly below it the ancap manifesto*

Pinned toot

@lofikenku the coochie emeralds

COOCHIE

CONTROL

\*sound of a woopy cushion being run under a hose*

my passive trait makes every coochie within a 10 foot radius become charged with static electricity

*superman by goldfinger comes on as i lay dead on the floor of kroger*

*swat breaks down my door to tell me how fucking owned i got*

*does a magic girl transformation but just turns into the hit or miss girl*

damn... my nuts feel like a DOOM 2 MIDI... 🗿

valve thinks they can ban me? can cage me? think again [i animorph into the scout from tf2 and begin running at full speed toward valve hq]

"if you get gonorrhea at a homestuck orgy you deserve that" - @Fruitbowlman during a crazy frog racer 2 stream

me, reading a youtube video description: "decalcifying your prostate chakra"
@Fruitbowlman , immediately: "im going to break every bone in your body, im going to come into your house and maul you like a wild bear"

*as my hands mercilessly bap at the keyboard, the camera zooms out to a broken destroyed ruin of our world, superimposed on the sky in the distance are the words "RON PAUL 2468" and directly below it the ancap manifesto*

*my nuts fall off and roll down the street into someone's house like a can of ravioli in a chef boyardee commercial*

popeye used to have to eat spinach before he fucked. he''d down the whole can and it would bounce through his body and fatten his dick up at the end like his arm

my brain is a bunch of worms wanting to live in the earth.

*fills a candy dish with bootleg anti-depressants and pain pills and puts it on my office desk*

me, reading a youtube video description: "decalcifying your prostate chakra"
@Fruitbowlman , immediately: "im going to break every bone in your body, im going to come into your house and maul you like a wild bear"

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