Eel or no Eel. You've got to guess which one the eel is in

raising my own class conscious by playing bethesda rpgs without stealing anything

I hear if you go to Burger King today they'll give you a free whopper as long as you're white. Kinda fucked up really but hey free burger!

sometimes you see a headline that says 'human sized penguin fossil discovered in new zealand' and sometimes you don't

"The bank is something else than men. It happens that every man in a bank hates what the bank does, and yet the bank does it. The bank is something more than men, I tell you. It's the monster. Men made it, but they can't control it."

if this post gets 100 boosts i will get my butthole sealed off for good

i do not know why people CW eye contact and instead of trying to find out i am going to assume it's something we do to stop gorillas with computers from flying into a rage

literally, verbatim, a direct copy-and-pasted headline and two paragraphs from an op-ed published in the fucking Washington Post today. i have made no changes to this. This literally got published (uspol, you cannot turn back once you open this cw) 

swallowing bad takes whole and letting them react and explode in my tummy. i smile and let smoke curl out from between my teeth and out my ears

she built like a limited edition donkey konga gamecube bongo controller

just wanna publicly reiterate my burning hatred for musicals and anthropomorphic animals

the future i'd like to leave for my kids looks a little like this: 

a tattoo of a download button and a larger fake download button

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