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Proud to say that after months of strict diet and exercise I now fit into a small condom.

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You can tell by the way I use my walk

I've got haemorrhoids, no time to talk

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Imagine if the wigs judges wear had been updated as wig technology improved like you're in court for a parking ticket and it looks like a fucking hair metal cover band

Heck yeah I'm an alpha male.

But, like, in the software sense of being incomplete and full of mistakes

Lol it's called night mode why are you using it during the day?

Tired: Open to die immediately
Wired: Open to have a little death immediately.

I really enjoyed Thief Simulator, will definitely be doing more of that in the future.

Quick reminder: I'll be on at 7:30 PM (in 4 hours) playing !

🏠🕵️💰 Su casa es mi casa 🏠🕵️💰

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A LOT of work went into this one. Including an honest to god photoshoot

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Cannot believe there's a famous author called Dick King Smith and we've not really picked up on that here.

I'll be live on at 7:30 PM (in 9 hours) playing !

🏠🕵️💰 Su casa es mi casa 🏠🕵️💰

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I've had a puppy for months now and haven't even bothered getting any clout from it yet. here's Nancy, she leant her head on my arm when I went to take a picture 🐍

@udell_games love to slam back a six-pack of Dick™ before the big game!

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