Neurotic Writer @writerneuroses@mastodon.social

My novel outlines are written in chalk. On the floor. And shaped like bodies. Because everybody dies.

Me: At least while I’m bed-bound with the flu, I’ll be able to write uninterrupted. I’m gonna get so much done. It’ll be the productiflu. A great fluppertunity.

Also me:

I quit writing today. It's been a difficult process, so in order to help others, I've decided to write about my experiences as an ex-writer.

*sings* If you're happy & you know it clap your hands...*pauses* See, your hands are too busy to type now. That's why writing requires angst

My cp keeps asking me why I have so many rainstorm scenes in my stories.
*turns off ambient soundtrack*
...I honestly hadn't noticed. Huh. 🤔

Son on career day: "My dad's a writer!"
Kid1: "What do you write?
Me: "Grownup stuff."
Kid 2: "How do you come up with stuff?"
Me: "Wine."

...they’ve never asked me back for some reason.

*needs to write*
*can’t focus*
*opens meditation app*
*does focus meditation*
*becomes incredibly focused...
...on napping*
*naps*

This year, I WILL #write every day. Every. Single. Day.

Except Tuesdays—I have a thing on Tuesdays. And Thursdays because that’s chore day. Fridays are TGIF, and I’ll deserve a break that day.

BUT BESIDES THOSE DAYS, I WILL WRITE EVERY DAY.

Except weekends, obvs.

And Mondays

My latest horror wip was inspired by true events in my life-true, dark events. It's called The Man Who Ran Out of Coffee & Had to Go Outside

Brainstorming* is an incredibly important part of my writing process. I brainstorm** all the time. Going to go brainstorm*** right now, in fact.
.
*napping
**nap
***nap

Hello, I have branched out to the Tusked Prehistoric Wooly Elephant Site from the Bird Site to share my neurotic writerly ramblings and, let’s face it, occasionally recycle my old stuff too.