Guess what I just learned from my procrastination audiobook? (Which I already knew deep down inside but didn't know how to vocalize it.)
Procrastinating is a self-defense mechanism. I associate succeeding with getting more work piled on me as the "reward" (learned behavior from experience) which is why I procrastinate. Mentally I equate succeeding with more work. I'm not sure how to change this, or if I should. We'll see how this unfolds.