bort @Joba@mastodon.social

fetch! *throws a dildo onto the highway*

*claps but not with my hands*

Dan and Phil after successfully killing macklemore

macklecum shot gamer

kenku: says anything
everybody: damn bitch ok lmao

socrates is making me so wise maybe i wont eat glue anymore

hey mastodon can we make the fuzzy worm on a string thing really popular so it infiltrates other social media and becomes a big meme and people start buying them en masse so companies start mass producing them and then a couple months later when it dies down all the stores will have a surplus and we'll be able to buy a lot of worms for very very cheap. like what happened to fidget spinners but with worms. plea

is there a reason some of you type like you're trying to pass along a secret message

one time me and a friend had autoplay on while rabbiting and a komaeda dinner date asmr came on which of course made us both hardcore zone out but when i came back to reality i heard him say to me "its not that i SUPPORT slavery per se, its just..." and i immediately astral projected

what is this guy doing...

fave pokeymons yea i got em

im sorry why did sasuke talk about milking a dog

they call me a cannibal because all I eat is coochie

alyson stop wearing those