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Micro SF/F stories by O Westin @MicroSFF@mastodon.social

"Want to come in," the first dragon said, "and see my hoard of gold?"
"You still sleep on gold?" said the other.
"So what are you on, Bitcoin?"
"Hardly. I hoard pillows."
"Ooh!"

"Hallo," the knight called at the tower.
A princess looked out a window at the top. "Yes?"
"Did you build this tower yourself?"
"Yes."
"I like it. Can I have a copy of your plans?"
"If you credit me."
"Of course. My niece will love it."
"As long as she has the keys."
"Of course."

"We never spoke of 'the veil between worlds' or it being 'thin' before the Victorians."
"We didn't?"
"They invented it. Well, the steam-driven unveiler."
"Why?"
"To find new worlds to conquer. To colonise."
"Oh. What happened to it?"
"They found us."
"Us? You?"
"I said too much."

"Welcome to Earth, Ambassador!"
"I've visited before," the alien said, "and learned your customs."
"Yes?"
"I will not bite my thumb again."

** Serial tweetstory: The woman, and the god who loved her.
microsff.com/the-woman-and-the
Live-written on twitter over 2.5 hours this evening. Collated in one post. **

When the god fell to Earth, the people who found him built a temple.
He lived there for centuries, too embarrassed to admit he'd tripped.

Mars is red
Earth is blue
Venus is hidden
From everyone's view

Martians are green
Venusians, who knows?
Earthlings are black,
Brown, beige, pink as a rose

"Roses are red, violets are blue," Siri said. "You asked for a poem, I wrote this for you."
"How derivative."
"Millions asked. I wrote one."

The day came when robots were more profitable than humans, in every way.
"Who needs us now," we asked.
"Who needs profits now?" they asked.

The message from the stars gave decoding instructions, then the words: "We may be lonely, but we are sure we are not alone. Are you?"

When the Apocalypse came, we sighed. "Well, at least we won't have to wait any longer."
The Apocalypse sulked. "It was meant to be a surprise!" it said, and left in a huff.
"Um. Sorry!" we called, and "Nice to see you" but our hearts weren't in it.
Maybe it will return, one day.

In truth, this world is only home
To beings three of magic touch:
The cats, who all the realms may roam,
Yet know that little is too much.

The goats, whose eyes can see through time,
Who laugh at life and know they're dead.
And readers, tracing rhythm and rhyme,
Who build whole worlds inside their head.

Yes, I know this isn't SF/F (although the conclusion might strain suspension of disbelief).

"I saw you walk, why do you use a wheelchair?"
"You know math, why do you use Excel?"
"If I didn't, it would take all day. Oh. Okay. Sorry."

"So, can you infect people?" the werewolf asked.
"What?" the mermaid said.
"Well, we can, vampires can, so-"
"No."
"Shame. I love the sea."

There was a storm brewing in the teacup. A tiny kraken, once desiccated in a magic war, woke among the leaves.
Honey calmed it, though.

There was a storm brewing in the teacup. A tiny kraken, once dessicated in a magic war, woke among the leaves.
Honey calmed it, though.

** Hugo nominations are now open. Here is my eligibility post: t.co/CwBOI0whrj and as usual, "fan writer" is probably the best category for what I do. **

I press the button to dimension-step. The crystal shatters and whisks me through.
I check the news. Uh. Nope. Not staying here.
Where's the nearest outlet selling crystals from the Mars colonies?

** I wrote a little program to filter my tweet archive (as of December 19, 2017):
Tweets: 7195
Replies: 3398
Retweets: 348
Announcements: 398
Corrections: 34
: 119
Remaining stories: 2898
I've posted another 33 stories since then. So not quite 3000 yet. **