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Please CW your opinions if they're good. I only want to see the terrible takes.

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On masto no one can hear that you're a right cockney geezer

:souls_t:​:souls_e:​:souls_l:​:souls_e:​:souls_d:​:souls_i:​:souls_l:​:souls_d:​:souls_o:​:souls_n:​:souls_i:​:souls_c:​:souls_s:​

My husband cleaned the toilet today, and my god, there's nothing like shitting on a clean bowl, amirite?

when you open a packet of biscuits and start jerking it into a tin, it's like a big penis jizzing out biscuits

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