Never underestimate the power of the mind to recycle old passwords:

I now have access to this account again because, of all the dumb luck, I finally broke down & GUESSED what my old, forgotten dot social password might me

got it right on the first try

is this Galaxy Brain
or just Lazy Brain?

knock knock who’s there? lewd lewd who? 

lewd knockers

(for awhile now i’ve been feeling ugly, old & fat. being ghosted has worn me down. i’ve never been good at cleavage selfies, but i took these just a little over a month ago & kept them to myself

i may not be skinny, but i AM stacked)

*handing out pamphlets*

hello, i’m a parent...
do you have a few minutes to talk about our savior,
Voluntary Sterilization?

me,
summoning my calmer self;
acknowledging my own insignificance;
sending forth good energy nonetheless

sending my love to you

boba fett is short for roberta fettuccine

alcohol 

ah, yes, everyone's excited for GoT this weekend, and I see why...Gin or Tonic is an exciting choice to make...

Bitch McConnell: I never thought in my lifetime we’d be having a serious debate over the merits of Capitalism....

Literally me, after hearing this: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*pause for breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

clothed torso; nipple, belly button no ec 

someone requested more Sarah tits;
thought i’d be a bit more demure here, tho braless

selfie, ec boosts ok 

my skin is by turns shiny & patchy & dry, & i didn’t get much sleep last night but i was trying to feel good about myself this morning, nonetheless
#nomakeup

idk what’s more pathetic, that Trader Joe’s has a podcast or that there’s an audience for a Trader Joe’s podcast

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