Never underestimate the power of the mind to recycle old passwords:

I now have access to this account again because, of all the dumb luck, I finally broke down & GUESSED what my old, forgotten dot social password might me

got it right on the first try

is this Galaxy Brain
or just Lazy Brain?

knock knock who’s there? lewd lewd who? 

*handing out pamphlets*

hello, i’m a parent...
do you have a few minutes to talk about our savior,
Voluntary Sterilization?

me,
summoning my calmer self;
acknowledging my own insignificance;
sending forth good energy nonetheless

sending my love to you

alcohol 

Bitch McConnell: I never thought in my lifetime we’d be having a serious debate over the merits of Capitalism....

Literally me, after hearing this: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*pause for breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

clothed torso; nipple, belly button no ec 

selfie, ec boosts ok 

idk what’s more pathetic, that Trader Joe’s has a podcast or that there’s an audience for a Trader Joe’s podcast

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