David Will @Trashbang@mastodon.social

He gives Leon 48,000 Pesetas for the Salazar Family Crown, the most expensive treasure in the game. That's less than three hundred Euros

The RE4 merchant hasn't appeared in any subsequent games because he sold all that Spanish cultist treasure at a 10,000% markup and has comfortably retired

add bonus semicolons to the ends of your lines of code to indicate how anxious you are about them

I have been stuck watching Adobe training videos for an hour and I have concluded there is nothing marketers want more in their workplace than the ability to reach out and manipulate abstract holographic shapes floating around them like a cloud of midges

'Four limbs, one head, lungs work most of the time' is a 300mb dependency package that everybody complains about but nobody has gotten around to replacing

The whole 'humans share ninety-something percent of their genetic code with [insert animal here]' thing makes a lot more sense when you realise most projects probably share ninety-something percent of their code in Javascript libraries

rules for designing cave environments:
- learn to make the most of your half-dozen royalty-free rock meshes
- anything can be bioluminescent if you need it badly enough
- abandon all pretenses of subtle signposting
- don't worry, nobody else knows how caves are made either

Instead of having damage numbers pop out of hit enemies, have them emit procedurally generated swears with increasing intensity and elaborateness in proportion to the effectiveness of the attack

*inhales slowly*

PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPES

Reasons I refresh the page:

2%: it's the conventional way to get updated data from the server

98%: your JS framework designed to obsolete 'refreshing the page' quietly died, again

Consider: Salvatore from Wind Waker but as a DM

Adjust the gamma slider until you can barely see the looming figure in your peripheral vision

Alright look, if I have to manually edit like half a dozen configs to accommodate it, that's not a 'plugin' any more. You are insulting the usability of plugs. That's a wireup, or possibly a messilysolderon

MMO NPC who tells you excitedly about the latest game updates without really understanding why they happen or where they come from. Every time there's a patch, another square of fabric mysteriously appears on their long, shabby coat

J.C: Can I borrow those for a moment?
JENSEN: What? Oh the sunglasses? Yeah, they just unclip.
...
J.C, holding up the lenses: Hey. Hey. Guess what?
JENSEN: No.
J.C: My vision is--
JENSEN: Don't you dare.
J.C: My vision is pigmented.

mastodon tab didn't load quite right and I feel personally attacked

I have logged onto Gumtree and entered the realm of people using 'retro' to describe furniture that looks like it had paint spilled on it and subsequently half-removed with a barbecue scraper

*remembers Ferngully* hey why did everyone insist I was the bat?