Avram Grumer ✅ @avram@mastodon.social

it's healthy

"All these moments will be lost in time, like... chariots... of... fire..."

#AlternateVangelisEasterEggs

its the year 2050. for 10 years your retinal implant has been blinking 12:00 because the company decided to stop supporting it

not joking here. serious post. if it becomes impossible to block ads at some point i'll just end up browsing the web like stallman does, furiously tapping the hook switch on a 1950s bell telephone to approximate V.32 9.6 kbps frequency/phase shift keying, with the telephone's audio output connected to one of those seismogram plotters. this will give me a paper copy that i can annotate & peruse at my leisure (ie write in the data in pencil, mark the start of packets with a highlighter)

In the mastodon justice system, the people are represented by two separate, yet equally important, groups: the police, who investigate memes; and the district attorneys, who prosecute the shitposters. These are their stories.

admin:
what happen?
moderator:
somebody set up us the hashtag
user:
we get toot
admin:
what !
user:
main timeline turn on
admin:
it's you !!
shitposter:
how are you tooters
all your meme are belong to us
you are on the way to lols
admin:
what you say !!
shitposter:
you have no chance to survive, boost your toots
ha ha ha ha
user: admin !!
admin:
take off every emoji
you know what you doing
move emoji for great justice

í can't believe y'all international mastodon users are gonna make me learn three new languages at the same time

a fork of Android where every time an app asks you to rate it, it rates it 1 star and then uninstalls the app

There is an underground #infosec battle going on between tweeting and tooting
https://mastodon.social/media/sIgoC0PF29v_MG9b2DY

For fuck's sake, why can't I just tab straight from text entry to the "TOOT!" button or use a keyboard shortcut? Having to touch my mouse to shitpost is majorly dampening my shitpost efficiency

I could really use some help with macOS UI work for this Mastodon client I'm working on. I'm struggling ridiculously with the core concept of NSTableView cell resizing.

Please boost.

my uncle works at mastodon and he gave me the cheat code for unlocking the secret fifth column that gets you unlimited toots and invicibility

"Will Mastodon make any money?" scream the journalists, who have forgotten the joy of building sandcastles on the beach

Mastodon Bechdel test: Does your instance have:
- A non-bot talking to
- Another human about
- Something other than Mastodon?