I keep getting the urge to tap out some scathing, furious political take on here and I keep stopping three words in because I’m enjoying just posting pictures of me and my dog after a bath gazing into a horizon made of pure adventure and snacks.

There’s something both inspiring and horrific about a clod like me rehearsing in a studio dedicated to Jerome Robbins.

If the legacy of my movie is “part IN TREATMENT, part THEY LIVE” I’ll die a happy man. Read this terrific review of THE HORROR AT GALLERY KAY: starburstmagazine.com/reviews/

I like to imagine “That’s Amore” being sung by three pizza box chefs who can’t agree on exactly what’s amore.

When humans chew with their mouths open, they are shameless, contemptible goblins.

When animals chew with their mouths open, it is the crunchity smackity music of angels.

Every tooter on here is incredibly nice, and Twitter has trained my brain so that I think something must be terribly wrong.

Like, where are the MRAs and Nazis? Shouldn’t someone be dropping into my mentions to make a bad-faith argument about the MeToo movement or say that Star Wars isn’t good anymore?


Fuckin a right I’m reading an interview with John Woo about the 25th anniversary of HARD TARGET.

As a man of taste and distinction, he recognizes the greatness of Brimley. hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vis

Saw the two big patriotic Indian Independence Day blockbusters.

GOLD is a pretty great rah-rah period sports epic. Rousing and handsome, total crowd-pleaser. Pure class.

SATYAMEV JAYATE? Oh man that movie is fuckin *bonkers*. Unintentionally homoerotic, sadomasochistic and morally haywire. It’s just an incoherent series of deranged murders punctuated by songs and howling man-feels.

Holy cow, I could watch it a thousand times.

I went to a party, so obviously the first thing I did was to find an area where there were no people.

Hooooooly fucking shit, BLACKKKLANSMAN. That is some god-level moviemaking in every single department. Spike Lee still has the fuckin *juice*.

Maybe this place will be where I put things that make me happy.

Man, I feel like someone who’s never tweeted.

BOILING POINT may be the great forgotten classic of Takeshi Kitano’s career. After surprising everyone with VIOLENT COP, with the opportunity to just make “a Takeshi Kitano movie”, he turned in a willfully perverse piece of work.

BP takes a standard gangster/revenge movie premise and centers it on a dim, unlikable dweeb who takes a really long dump.

It’s a dreamlike series of digressions, some funny, some horrifying. And it’s hypnotic. I could watch it a thousand times.

So maybe here on Mastodon is where I can share my FINAL SPACE feels.

I binged it this weekend and I fucking loved it.

It’s not perfect (the protagonist-who-obsesses-unhealthily-over-a-disinterested-woman-but-who’s-actually-totally-a-good-dude trope can be done now thanks) but I don’t know if I’ve seen something that *feels* like this. It bowled me over. I found myself crying multiple times.

The heedless mix of gags, tragedy & genuine sci-fi grandeur won’t stop...I think it *haunts* me. Fuck.

So the format will take a little getting used to as such things always do for me. I tend to hate new things as well.

You know what I love?

No Nazis.

OH WOW and I can make certain toots private? I have wanted this FOREVER.


So. Hi.

I’m Bastard Keith. My civilian name is Abe Goldfarb, but I’m best known in my burlesque persona.

I made a movie. You can find out more about it here: www.thehorrorathallerykay.com

I’ll be tooting about politics, art, nerdery, and probably ass-eating. The mix will vary daily.

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