"At a time like this, scorching irony, not convincing argument, is needed. O! had I the ability, and could I reach the nation's ear, I would, to-day, pour out a fiery stream of biting ridicule, blasting reproach, withering sarcasm, and stern rebuke. For it is not light that is needed, but fire; it is not the gentle shower, but thunder. We need the storm, the whirlwind, and the earthquake."

- Frederick Douglass, 1952 USA Independence Day address

Coupons are like 3rd grade busy work: you have to cut along the dotted line or enter a secret code in order to get credit. I can't stand coupons.

How did I go my whole life without ccat? It's cat but with syntax highlighting!


WIFE and I received this warm, personalized welcome letter from NAME OF ASSOCIATION

I would like to draw everyone's attention to the only member of the UK government that isn't a complete bastard, Larry

Larry is Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Office of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland

This is his actual official title

Funny, long story that will make you hate me when I'm done. Show more

@bignimbus I dreamed about this moment but never thought it would come true.

Congratulations, everyone who reads this toot has been upgraded to a free trial Jeff Prime™ membership for one year!

Ladies, if he:

- never responds to your texts
- is always on the web
- is dynamic, weakly typed, and prototype-based

He's not your man, he's JavaScript.

Ladies, if he:

-never responds to your texts
-goes out of his way to make you feel bad
-multiplies rapidly at temperatures between 68 and 104 degrees

He's not your man. He's a foodborne pathogen.

This holiday season don't forget to pick up Ayn Rand's family Christmas book, Shelf on the Elf.

Additions, part 1:

* Quality of touch-tone "melody" generated from dialing the numbers

A friend and I are trying to come up with a unified theory of phone number aesthetics, here are the criteria so far:

* Patterns found in the digits
* Cadence when saying the number out loud
* Symmetry of the number when written out
Letter-number mappings - any words or sequences in there?
* Physical layout on a touch-tone phone - is it pleasant to dial?

That amazing feeling when your 35000 LOC diff gets through QA virtually unscathed

Show more

Follow friends and discover new ones. Publish anything you want: links, pictures, text, video. This server is run by the main developers of the Mastodon project. Everyone is welcome as long as you follow our code of conduct!