I don't understand why FedEx doesn't have a dedicated aircraft that flies packages (laptops) from the factory directly to my house. Is that really so much to ask?

Sean Heber boosted

I have noticed a large portion of those on #Mastodon happen to be #Linux users and #FOSS advocates in general. Lets see just how many are.

What's your OS?

Sean Heber boosted

A programmer walks into a bar and orders 1.38 root beers. The bartender informs her it's a root beer float. She says 'Make it a double!' 🤣

We just watched Sonic 2 for movie night and that was sure a thing. A fun thing.

Sean Heber boosted

Will things get better?

Please boost for sample size.

Sean Heber boosted

HTTPS is just hypertext playing hard to GET

Sean Heber boosted

Theory: crypto is actually the cover story generated by strong AI to protect itself as it sucks up more and more of the world's energy and processing power.

Gosh I love the smell of charcoal. Must be genetic.

Amazon could get that to me by Monday. Just sayin', Apple.

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🚨 My laptop is now in Memphis, Tennessee! 🚨

That's only about 650 miles away but the estimated delivery date is still Thursday. 🤔

Friendly is exhausted after a busy day of vanquishing his enemies.

Sean Heber boosted

@tewha

D: "You! Craft... human. Do you have Gagh today?"

C: "Haha sir, that joke never gets old - even after 5 days."

D: "Joke?"

C: "Well, Mike you know that Gagh isn't real.. I mean.. you're not actually a..."

D: "I AM WORF, SON OF MOGH, WARRIOR OF THE KLINGON EMPIRE!"

C: "Uh.. okay sir.. um.. let me just look in the back.. I think I have a bag of gummy worms back here somewhere..."

D: *growls in grudging agreement*

Sean Heber boosted

@tewha

Actor: "Uh yeah, Michael, I thought we could change this.."

Director: "It's Worf."

A: "Oh, right.... 'Worf'... I thought maybe if we..."

D: "I heard those air quotes."

A: "No no.. I.."

D: "You dare dishonor me with air quotes!?"

A: "No.. sir... uh.."

D: "Today is a good day to die....... rect! Hahahahahaha!"

A: "hahah... ha... good one... Mike.... uh.. Worf.."

D: "There will be no changes to the script."

A: "Thank you sir. Sorry sir."

It always seems quiet here on Friday evenings. I guess that means a lot of you have lives or something. Wonder what that’s like… 🤔

I dont know why Starfleet every goes to Risa. It pretty much never ends well.

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OMG third episode trying to get to Risa… is it going to happen?! It’s been a looong road… getting from there to…. Risa?

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Archer just pointed toward the sun and said, “this way is east” and now I’m really wondering how you’d know that on an alien planet without a compass. I mean, it’s not a given that the sun rises in the east… and what if the planet has two suns? What if there’s no magnetic field! I have questions!

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Uh oh I’m detecting political themes in this episode. Since when is Star Trek political! This is an outrage! A travesty! A controversy! How dare they wear their baseball caps inside the shuttle craft! Rude!

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Hmm this planet looks like Tatooine. Now that’s pod racing!

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