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I figured out my gender, it’s Pink Cat

That’s it, pack up, everyone can go home

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Slack: It looks like you're back, but your status is set to away. Would you like to change your status to active?
Me: no Slack, shut up, I don't exist

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me online: hey look at my selfie (◡ ‿ ◡ ✿)
me IRL: dONT LOOK AT ME

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hello, it is I, @carami. probably making this my main.

covid 

I have:
- a headache (mostly just on Tuesday)
- sinus pain
- runny nose
- slightly sore throat
- small cough
- dizziness (I have a dizzy spell almost every time I stand up, and frequently feel dizzy when I’m not even moving)
- a lot of fatigue

All of these things could be dismissible as allergies, dehydration, and/or tiredness from having two babies (one of which isn’t sleeping through the night yet), exacerbated by hypochondria.

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covid 

So, husband’s results came back negative. I’m just gonna get tested today because maybe he got tested too early, I still don’t know what’s up with me, etc.

Although this DOES increase the likelihood that I’m just having some kind of seasonal allergies maybe, or this is all psychological; I’d be fine with that tbh

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covid 

anyway he’s asymptomatic because he sucks ):< meanwhile I’ve been feeling shittier and shittier as the day goes on.

the kids seem okay too, so that’s all I really care about

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covid 

one of my husband’s coworkers that he works with closely was sent home with a sore throat last Thursday. I guess she’s a college student with 3 roommates and all of them are sick with covid-like symptoms but none of them have gotten tested because they don’t care about other humans or something.

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Husband: you should learn...sapphire on roads
Me: no
Husband: pearl on lifts
Me: perl is actually a language, without the “a”
Husband: really?
Me: yep
Husband: well, they should put it on lifts

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Husband: you should learn…emerald on sticks
Me: …no
Husband: you know :D
Me: no
Husband: ‘cause it’s like—
Me: no
Husband: ruby—
Me: nooo
Husband: on rails—
Me: NOOO

I feel like I was a teen or 20-something in the 70s in a past life and died somehow and was reborn in 1989 but that’s why I’m so obsessed with disco

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sugar, facetious drug mention 

anyway I just ate straight cocoa mix because s̶u̶g̶a̶r̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶d̶r̶u̶g̶ I have no self control

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sugar, facetious drug mention 

is sugar literally addictive

is sugar a drug

what IS a drug technically

website: please disable your ad blocker or else we're not going to let you see our content

me: oh, okay, I'm sorry, one sec

*adds site to javascript block list*

caps 

damn code doing what I tell it to do instead of what I want it to do

WHY CAN'T YOU READ MY MIND

I'm

⚪️ a man
⚪️ a woman
🔘 a buff baby that can dance like a man, i can shake-a my fanny, i can shake-a my can! i'm a tough tootin' baby, i can punch-a yo buns! punch-a yo buns, i can punch all yo buns! if you're an evil witch, i will punch u for fun

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