My new opening line on the dating apps:

I'm on the apps because I tend to burn bridges. What about you?

when we finally close the book on our sordid little species, i think the photo they use for our obituary should just be that picture of sweatshop laborers making hundreds of identical Guy Fawkes masks in china because that's humanity in a nutshell

PROSTATE orgasm? no thank you im an anarchist, im not pro-state anything

Seriously, the bit about the index in Williams Obstetrics is the best thing I've ever seen in a reference book. It's great subversion. Kudos to the editor's wife for that hack!

biometrics are usernames dammit!

quit pretending they are passwords


*grumble*stupid big tech firms*grumble*

Seems made up because it is. Made up about 158 years ago, if you may.

haha i know we joke guys but for real if theres any number of wolves inside you thats a medical emergency for you and the wolves

@TeethTeethTeeth you've been hit by,
You've been stuck by,
A quattro formaggio

Kant believed that you have an absolute moral duty to like and share my posts

im still laughing my ass off at the fact that jacques chirac, the french president who refused to join in with the iraq war, became president in order to escape being criminally prosecuted for spending $1 million dollars in lunch expenses over a single year of his tenure as mayor of paris

my body is trying to carrot stick me into working out more by making my skincare shine so brightly this evening


My dad was on the U.S.S Maddox, the boat that was “attacked” that started the Vietnam war. He said no one could understand why they were in the Tonkin gulf until one officer at breakfast goes “they sent us here to get blown up so they can start a war they really want to start.”


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