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I'm Russian to get a Warm Water Port if you know what I mean ;)

When Jesus said the meek would inherit the earth, he meant because they're the only ones socially distancing

Unloading my dusty old van at the marketplace of ideas and getting ready for another tiring day hawking concepts like "Cum Zombies" and "Don Quixote's Oaty Donkey"

You still won't get any responses though. For some reason that lot think you're biased against them now.

So you just summarise a few of their tweets and act like you've done literally any diligence

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Feeling bad about this, you'll reach out to a couple of people on Twitter with in their names because they tend to be pro the environment, right? Put them under the helpful heading "Who else have we contacted?"

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So you go on facebook and their cousin keeps posting memes about how the climate is a hoax.

You just copy a few of those and put those in instead, in the area designated for the rebuttal

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There's a whole lot of bad in that article but that might be the worst bit, honestly. Imagine you want a balancing quote from a climate scientist, but they don't answer their phone.

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I will follow up this sucker punch with a right hook of failing to reach a primary contact for a quote and solving it by putting in a quote from a second person who disagrees with them in their place

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I, a national broadcaster, will absolutely balance this hate-filled article by not interviewing anybody on the other side and just summarising some twitter conversations they had in the past.

For the best experience, I suggest boosting this one without reading it

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@hiscursedness all these magic spells and otherworldly contracts and none to stop being single.

Disgusting, lyrics 

I tried to fart
and got so far
But in my pants
It's getting even wetter

Something I like about Encased: It does a Fallout but in an active apocalypse scenario. We're not in the After Times, but we're entirely cut off from the rest of civilisation, so a lot of the same tropes are in effect.

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