The world is very confusing right now, but I’m pretty sure I have one duty: to grow a huge apocalypse beard

I just witnessed telephone sanitizers and had to restrain myself from thanking them for saving civilisation

I have sustained a Krispy Kreme injury. I guess that’s some sort of snack karma?

The new end of trip facilities in my building are nice, but I’m wondering… what sort of person showers with their phone?

Is it still “manspreading” if it’s performed by a woman?

This is your annual reminder that we are now entering The Internet Is Stupid Day. Please ignore everything on the internet for the next 24-48 hours.

Taj has had a lot to deal with in his life, but he's doing this for everyone else. Maybe consider sponsoring him

“I am the Almighty Colossal Siege Chicken!”

If you like Spider-Man, comics, animation, or just a great story told with mind-blowing creative vision, "Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse" is a film that you need to see.
If you have seen it, just know that the Christmas album actually exists:

Why do bugs
Suddenly appear
Every time
Friday’s near?
Just like me,
They long to be

Hallowe'en health and safety advice:
Do not dress as a one-armed, stumbling zombie if you value your spine or hips

2pm: a new record for realising that my fly has been down all day.

An early Father’s Day present has left me with an important question: is it ok to eat nothing but cinnamon scroll donuts all day?

Currently reading a computer science paper from 1972. The typewriter aesthetic is making me super-nostalgic for university.

Netflix: Are you still watching?
Me: Please don’t leave me alone with my thoughts
Netflix: What?
Me: Nothing. All good. I’m fine

me: thank you for that glass of milk earlier

sperm bank employee: what glass of milk

me: the glass of milk that was sitting on your desk

sperm bank employee: oh my god

me: what

sperm bank employee: you drank my glass of milk


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