Pinned toot

*steps outside, looks up*

The Eugen milkshake duck moment is gonna rock our fucking world, and I don't know if I'm excited for it or not

The capybara is a truly majestic beast; it is the catbus of rodents.

a handsome meatball for my fellow tooters

Wotan decided to pose. He knows how good he looks

I’m on two instances at once and I feel like live bees are going to start flying out of my mouth

this is my favorite picture that I've taken in a while. it's a colony of hydroid (invertebrate animals) that use their tentacles to stun prey and pull it into their mouths. this species is called the pink hearted hydroid. plz always send me weird ocean things. weird shit from the ocean is my life blood.

‪Sex is great and all.

But have you ever tried dying in a shallow creek bed and letting the earth slowly mineralize your skeleton for future scientists to study your remains?‬

replace all instances of the word 'post' in your life with 'toot'. for example. tootpunk. tootmodern. lamptoot. washington toot. first past the toot. la toote. deutsche toot. united states tootal service.

*clicks the "forgot password" link*
:hacker_i: ' :hacker_m: :hacker_i: :hacker_n:

Celine Dion gifs

Just a reminder to new Mastodon folks: if you want to join an instance where the only letter you can use is "e", I run and registrations are open!

hmm i have to work tomorrow. seems like a bad call

(I didn't drive, but just getting out of the house is really exhausting for me)

I have accomplished two of my three goals for today and that's impressive as hell bc they were both body-intensive: clean the fridge, and go out for a drive

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