Pinned toot

"i understand. You found paradise in mastodon. People boosted your toots, you got a lot of followers, the admins were good, so you didn't need a friend like me. Now you come and say "Kai, boost my mario circumcision toots". you don't offer friendship, you don't even think to call me "the piss dude" You come into my house on the day my daughter is to be married and you ask me to boost your toots."

Pinned toot
Pinned toot

Just sitting in my cousins bed in the dark, drinking a Dr Pepper and trying not to cry

to live in the countryside is to stand in righteous arrogance of technological development. it is profane and can not be abided by

day 3 at my cousin's house: i am overwhelmed both by the manner in which my relatives raise their children as well as the near constant reek of methane. living in the countryside is a form of intentional and prolonged torture

i refuse to believe that online trad wives are real, you can't live out in the sticks with a square-headed husband and be this good at posting

looking through my old one note that i don't use anymore and i don't know what i was doing to make a post this nonspecific and inexplicable

me, genius: actually dumbass earth is going the opposite extreme weather, im no scientist but some very angry men online told me its good

day 2 at my cousins house: her husband thinks im also a conservative and cornered me at the dinner table telling me climate change is not real and the earth is actually getting colder

I don't know shit about sword art online but I'm channel searching and I guess it's fantasy again and this dude is in it who looks the way I feel whenever I look in the mirror

watched like 4 hours of shark tank today unintentionally. the funny thing about it is how the guy named mr. wonderful is actually very unpleasant to be around. much like the joker, its very twisted

Kai boosted

U2's lead guitarist calls himself The Edge because he's never cum

Sorry I watched like 4 hours of shark tank with my cousins today so it's all in my head

"I don't know what the term "dialectical materialism" means count me out Mr. Marx"

*mark Cuban voice* I'm not acquainted with the expanded universe of Dune, I'm out.

You are all a bunch of grimy little freaks

The peak of brands is common doing slam poetry about a.i

He also owns every x men movie maybe this guy whips ass actually

My chad cousin in law told me he's a pc gamer and has both justice league and man of steel on bluray

Have fun cleaning my room dipshit, I never even legally lived here this is me going ssj3

My roommate kept calling me telling I left a mess when I left a couple pieces of trash and was telling me to come back and clean so I talked to him once and then blocked his number. I may no longer have a house but life is about having the last laugh in every situation

Kai boosted

Ima get my dick sucked clean off my body this weekend Hell no im not registered to vote

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